Acai Berry and Colon Cleanse Weight Loss Suppliments

If you search on-line for anything to do with diet or colon health, you will be inundated by articles about Acai Berry and Colon Cleanse. There are testimonies after testimonies of people who have lost weight using these supplements, as well as encouragements to take advantage of free trials. There are even long blogs by people chatting about how wonderful the products are.

Please read, I have lots of great things to say and I promise to make you laugh.

If you are offended by the words, penis or pindick then you should not read on.

Acai Berry and Colon Cleanse Marketing Strategy

1. Spread the Rumour

Most people are familiar with the principle of hearsay in court. Basically unless you witnessed something yourself, then it is not admissible. The rule is more complicated than this, but the usefulness of the principle is best illustrated by this small town fictional example.

Dolly is upset because her boyfriend Hank dumps her, so she tells her best friend Marg that he has a small penis. Marg tells her friends and they all tell their friends who tell all their boyfriends who are Hank’s mates. The truth is that Dolly hadn’t even seen Hanks penis, but pretty soon he is called Pindick, and his reputation is ruined.

If you have a product to sell, with the use of the internet you could use this strategy quite nicely. I advise that I am not insinuating in anyway that anyone has a small penis.

All you would have to do is tell a lot of people, and get a lot of people to tell people that your product worked. Due to the way search engines work, if you do this to a great enough magnitude then whenever the issue is searched then your version of events is all they are ever going to see.

2. Pay people to write about it

That’s right, not only do you spread the rumour, you greatly increase it by paying people to write a personal account about how they used the product. It doesn’t matter if it is entirely fictional.

You may be thinking that I have gone too far, but I challenge you to look into it yourself. Or maybe you are someone who wrote for them and you are feeling guilty?

At the bottom of one of the blogs following someone’s personal account I found a disclaimer that paid actors may have been involved in any of the representations in the article or following blog! I was dumbfounded.

3. Offer a free trial, then make the client pay for it??

This was weird. Upon examination of the free trial offers, and in the fine print I worked out that it was not actually free. After the expiration of the trial period if you don’t send your unused tablets back and tell them you don’t want to go on you have to pay for the tablets you got for your free trial??? I don’t know, maybe I was confused but that’s what it looked like to me.

Self Confessions of an almost Sucker!

Although it will make me look like a twit, I will tell you how I learnt all about it.

You see, after having 3 kids and all types of diets, I was backed up and had a haemorrhoid city going on down there so I started doing research on colon cleansing. I was still breastfeeding so I needed a healthy alternative.

I almost got into the ‘free trial’, but backed out due to my fears regarding the colon cleansing supplement being harmful to my baby.

The following is not exact, as I don’t have a photographic memory, but it is as best as I can recall.

When I left the site I got the ‘do you really want to leave this site’, and ‘take advantage of a further discount’ pop-ups. Finally the ‘do you want to talk to an on-line sales rep’ pop up came up and I thought I might as well ask a few questions. It went something like this;

“Hi, if you sign up now you can get a further 50% off for the next 6 months!”

Me: I was just wondering if it is safe when breastfeeding

“Take advantage of huge savings, click OK to sign up now”

Me: I couldn’t find a list of ingredients on your website

“What are you waiting for, start loosing weight today”

Me: Can you please answer my questions

“What questions” (finally an indication that there was a person there, not a machine)

Me: Is it safe for breastfeeding?

“What are you waiting for? If you sign up now we will give you a etc etc etc…”

I gave up.

 

Finally - The Truth

Even though the product marketing was an obvious ploy to sell their particular products, I was still convinced that I needed a cleanse. I also thought the Acai Berry sounded like a good idea for antioxidants and an energy boost. After all I trust Oprah and Dr Oz!

I took an Acai Berry supplement for a couple of months. I didn’t really notice a difference. I lost weight, but only when I was limiting my calorie intake and exercising like any normal weight loss program.

I got onto some great fibre supplements to put on my muesli. I can safely say I am not backed up anymore and still include a high fibre breakfast. All my poos are floaters and my roid city has reduced itself to a smaller town with a declining population. Once again, I have only lost weight while eating healthy and exercising.

If you need to clean yourself out there are heaps of detox products, I found some without the aforementioned disclaimers that look pretty good. There are also natural methods, like eating fruit and veg, or juice cleansing diets.

As for the Acai Berry, I don’t take it anymore as it was really expensive and although they say the high antioxidants are great I couldn’t see the point in keeping it up. I might start again when I get wrinkly, or win the lotto.

At the end of the day there is no quick fix to weight loss.

The Anti Gossip challenge.

So how do we fix the problem? Well let’s go back to our poor friend Pindick, and see how he might fix the situation.

Pindick goes to a party. After being laughed at for the hundredth time by the girls there, he gets angry and drinks way too many rums. Once he is very, very drunk, one of the girls has a giggle and says “hey pindick, do you want another drink”. Pindick exposes himself. This is all the town talks about for the next month. ‘Pindick’ is now the ‘Elephant Man’. The truth has been revealed.

If we flood the internet with the truth, then we will drown out the marketing voice of a scheme which should be illegal. Get writing my friends. We have the power.